Article

Murphy's law on pilot boarding - Arie Palmers


by Arie Palmers - published on 20 July 2021 461 -

1. Any knot that can come loose will do so at the most inconvenient moment

2. Slipknots are called like that for a reason

3. The last bolt of 8 holding the gangway platform up, will let go when a pilot stands on it

4. Gangway platforms that were severely stuck, will suddenly give way when a pilot steps on it

5. Rain always starts 5 minutes before the pilot transfer

6. Wind will start blowing 5 minutes prior to ETA pilot station

7. If there is a way to rig a pilotladder wrong, someone will do so eventually

8. The day you forget your helmet a twistlock will fall down from the vessel you’re attempting to board

9. Automatic lifejackets will inflate automatically at the moment you absolutely don’t want them to

10. From all ways to rig a ladder, the wrong way is the easiest

11. Whenever several things can go wrong, the one that causes most damage will

12. Every solution breeds new problems

13. It’s impossible to make a foolproof pilot ladder securing device because fools are so ingenious

14. You cannot legislate for stupidity

15. Probability of a bow thruster failure is inversely proportionally to distance with the quay

16. If everything seems to be going well, you’re overlooking something

17. The chances of the pilot launch scratching the paint of a vessel is directly proportional to the cost and date of the last drydock paintjob

18. A shortcut to the bridge is always the longest distance between 2 points

19. When you eliminate 4 ways on which a pilotladder can be rigged wrong, a fifth way you’re unprepared for will promptly develop

20. You’re always against the current until you’re almost there

21. Wind is not your friend

22. A safe lee is non existing

23. When there is a chance of getting wet during transfer, you will

24. Pilot launches are exponentially stronger than ankles

MURPHY WAS AN OPTIMIST
sea, river, harbor pilot (westerschelde, oosterschelde and adjacent coastal area) active marine pilot - Loodswezen - NEDERLANDSE LOODSENCORPORATIE


50 years old, without a proper birthday party this year ( thank you corona..) 12 years as a pilot 2 years offshore/tugboats 8 years with juvenile delinquents mv Koningin Juliana, mv Smal Agt 8 years Navy: minehunter, explosive ordnance clearance 2 years army: artillery sergeant

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Captain Michal Sinius Poland
on 1 August 2021, 06:21 UTC

Item 16 summs up it all!
0

RC
Ricardo Caballero Vega Panama Canal Pilots Association, Panama
on 20 July 2021, 16:09 UTC

I could not agree more!
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